The cycles were cycling like they used to, it was the second time I would be expecting my menstrual period. I was so happy, my mom said I’m now a lady and my dad was explaining to me what it meant to go on a date.
No, that wasn’t the first time I would know about dating, it was just the time that my dad remembered to talk about it because my mom informed him that it’s almost my second circle.
I was glowing like the New York sun in summer, I feel on top of the world like the skyscrapers in Brooklyn and I wouldn’t stop thinking about staying at queens when I’m 30 with the love of my life.
Someone said it becomes cold when it snows, and for my circles, they become red when it’s ending of the month.
I wasn’t thinking too much about the red blood, the only thing that gets me up at night is the pain that comes with my menses and all I could think about on this Wednesday was how messed up I had become because I have to pay my respect to the monthly red man.
Mum, is this how I have to pass through pain every time the red man comes? I quietly asked my mom while she plays with my belle.
Nicky, this will only last for four days and you’ll be fine. It’s a part of being a woman, the sacrifice of the female folks – we should be more respected for having to pass through this, you know.
My mom was right, we should be respected for having to pass through pain like this monthly. I murmured that statement but deep inside me, I knew I would have preferred to be a John, or Zack at this moment of pain.
The pain that comes with my circles persisted for the next few years, I would pray the circles never come when I think about the pain, and this is what I have to pass through, at every circle.
When I was at my late 19, I couldn’t bear the pain that comes with my circles any longer, it becomes a burden that I started resorting to numerous drugs and pain killers just to escape the pain that comes with the blood.
This circle continues until I was near my 20th birthday and on the day that the sky was crying, I found myself in the theater on the operation bed.
What led to my procedure you would ask? I also quiz myself about that too, the monthly pain has finally led me to the procedure and here I am being told that I had a hyper-growth of hormone that secret with my eggs every month.
I was dead for some minutes until the doctor told me the full details of what caused the pain, I wouldn’t believe he really said all those things, I’m sure you’re wondering what things – it was a bloody red sad day for me, I hope you’re reading this, I am reading it too.
Dedicated to Nicole – This is her story, from my perspective…. And she liked it